Just a Little Bit, Just to See How it Feels.

Seasons Greetings,

   Here I hang at Maple Fuels in Maple Falls to bring to "you" the things that I do do. As you may have thought that I was going to college, I pulled your leg and arm and gave you a tittie twister because I AM NOT! HAHAHHAHHA YA FOOLS! Well, I am, just not in January. So it seems our wonderful goverment doesn't want to give this 23 year old independent male any grants for college. So, I am just not going to try and figure student loans out until the 4th quarter or possibly next fall. Which means... THAT I AM GOING TO SHRED SNOWBOARDING ALL WINTER AND YOU SHOULD TOO!
   Things that are on my chest that need to be off my chest include but are not related to scuba-drifting:
1. Working on Christmas...
   That is basically it, no one wants to, but I did... Sure, I got a bonus of 20 bucks and 20 dollar gift certificate and won a helmet that is too big for my noggin and I happily handed it off to a friend in need, it still doesn't account for my having to work that hard and deal with all those hungry people. Needless to say, I had a good Christmas that was filled with laughs and friends. I did (and do) feel bad for missing my first family christmas, but they know I was there in spirit. To everyone I normally see on that Merry day, please know that I'll do my best to be there next year!
   What is life on the mountain like? Well, I work in a cooler version of a fast food restaurant and listen to a mix of dance and rap music... I get to snowboard (sometimes). There is a snow igloo that is getting so BAA DASS that Nate slept in it the other night. Pretty much just hang out and laugh, even when I work. Though, yesterday at work I asked someone if they wanted Orange Milk with their chicken nuggets... We don't have orange milk... Also, I watched a kid cough at me and I felt like I was going to be sick, because he looked pale and deathly. Then, two minutes later, he fainted and started crying... and all his dad did was say "HE IS FINE, HE JUST NEEDS THIS LEMONADE AND CHICKEN NUGGETS!" I fear for that poor boy, getting aids or herpes and just remedying it with rub on chicken nuggets dunked in lemonade his whole life. Poor fellow. On the upside, I am not sick.
   I got a newer pair of used boots, ya know, instead of the 96' Airwalks... Along with those sick Burton Boots, I have a new "used" helmet that has already come in handy. I was also gifted a sweet pair of bindings for when I stumble upon a sweet snowboard. Looks like I am rad rad rad ready! My learning curve is taking its "super happy fun time" where you have to go really fast before you fall. Makes for faster learning and faster turning.
   What else to tell the few people that read this? Life is good, I am happy, I am full, and I am alive. The mountain is a whole different style of life and I feel I've only just dipped my toes in. Come Jan. I feel like the new year will bring leaps of enjoeyment, hopefully for everyone! Without further adieu I am going to buy a case of beer. "Smooches and Farts"- A Hero of mine once said.

Farts

From the Eyes of a Mountain Bum,

   "Sup brotha-man?" T-Sloan pipes.
   "Oh, goin' out to tha snow cave." Brotha-man merrily replies.

Now its time for Mountain Dictionary Edition 2013 Revised.

Chunder ball: N. A giant block of ice, usually at the bottoms of Cat-Tracks, dangerous if encountered without reaction time.

Canadian Thanksgiving: P.N. It's in October.

Core Shot: When a rock busts through the base layer of your skis or board. 2. Getting shot by a gun in the midsection.

   Here I sit at the Employee Lodge of Mt. Baker Ski and Snowboard area. I had to work today, but we once again have terrible snow conditions so we are not busy, hence the had. However, working here is not about the work, but the perk. Going out every day to catch some pow-turns, drop some cliffs, or just jovially gallivant and traverse the varying terrains the mountain has offer on your skis or your snowboard. I digress.
   I came here with nothing but a heart, a soul, a mind, and a body. Upon arrival the kindness of others has begun hitting me like ocean waves. In a week and a half, I am fully equipped to snowboard whenever I want/get the chance too. Thus far, I have gone out 3 times and have damn learned a lot! First things first, don't put your hands down to fall, you'll break your wrist. Second, your ass will hurt if you do the first correctly. Third, when you begin to fall harder, your learning a lot faster...
   That last line brings up my first lie. Well, not really a lie, just a time out of time thing (I mean, if I wrote this blog sooner, it wouldn't be a lie, but because of "time" I guess I lied). I am NOT fully equipped to be riding this mountain, I need one more item. Yesterday I smashed my face going quite fast into a heelside turn, instead caught my toe edge of the snowboard, thus making me gain super powers as I Super Maned right onto my face and chest, knocking the wind out of me and making me think semi funny thoughts, aka a bit delirious. SO, after I managed  to get back up and ride the rest of the way down to the Raven Hut (backcountryesk lodge), I strolled in to find some friends kickin it, warming up, and getting coffee. We shared our daily riding stories and VOILA! Lucas, an Australian who moved to Glacier (closest town) offered to hook it up with his helmet an his old boots (I am currently rockin some mid-90's Airwalks). BAM! Now this brain of mine won't get too scrambled!
   Alright alright alright alright WHATEVER ALREADY. If you love snowboarding or skiing and your stuck in Wisconsin and you think you need an actual mountain to ride. I suggest finding one, moving there as an employee, living on the mountain, and riding as much as possible. you will progress more than you ever have. Plus, you get to meet some of the craziest cool cats ever. Every day is story time, If that means listening to one, telling one, or creating one, it is eye opening and mind blowing.
   So you snow heads out there, strap your balls on and make some moves son. Or strap your boobs on, to you beautiful women, but ya know, not being sexist, it's just, ya know, like, works better with balls... I mean, harumph sigh. Sorry.

Sorry this was a pretty lame post. The mountain life out here is so awesome that I have to balance it by making it less cool on the introwebs. Now go give a stranger a hug, buy the next person in line their coffee order, and snag that handicap spot you've always wanted!

Karma Cheers,
    Joey "WISCONSIN" Michels

 Keepin the gear safe, mouser ftw

 Mt. Shukstan

 Dorms anyone?

Kiss Farm Boy Ass Goodbye!

SCHNARF,

   Well folks, another day, another ... shit I made no money. But, that is what WWOOFing is all about. It's not about making flow so you can toss up yo billz and make it rain on bitchz! It's about sharing knowledge, making change, living a healthy lifestyle... Damn, I think I am in the wrong profession... HA YOU WISH BILL LUMBERG! In all honesty, WWOOFing is such a good organization. It's a network of knowledge. A reins toward travel and experience. A way to shoo yourself from the confines of your everyday life. An escape module to a planet of good food. Don't you just wanna?!
   Jim and Vera have been wonderful hosts and to that I thank them. My time at Biocharm farms has been well spent. I have learned the right amount of knowledge for future farm preparation and production. My future will one day contain damn good food!
  To Ilwaco, I was hardly there so I don't think you care what I say about you. Also, your inanimate.
   To life. <-That is just a good cheers.
   The chicken coop is not finished... That kinda sucks, but I don't blame myself. Sometimes you have to stop and smell flowers? No, no, just stop and hang out, read a book, drink lots of coffee, and do your best to crush crossword puzzles that you never finish.
   This next paragraph is for the things to come. Please, mountain, let my Wisconsin skin be able to bear your hardly freezing temperatures. Don't hit me with an avalanche. If you do, let me live and not be injured (AWW DANGLES! I WALKED UNDERNEATH A LADDER TODAY!). The thought of being around peers truly warms the cockles of my heart. Perhaps, mountain, make my beard, or lack there of, grow in fuller. Well, that's enough I guess.
   Say hi to your animals for me.

Exotic love,
   Joey Michels

 

A quick jaunt of a p o e m.

Here I rest for one last night
The moment has come, the work is done
Biocharm will always need an extra hand
for mine I've lent with no restraint
But tomorrow brings a new day
A whole new different place to stay

What I am leave behind I have only gained
Knowledge from some ancients ways
To grow a better crop
To build a home for chicken crap
Life on the farm is perfect for what it is worth
Life on a mountain will be a whole new different Earth.

MORE TO COME! Not poetry though, poetry is for SUCKAS!

They are everywhere

There are so many words that go said but never heard
Everything left unsaid just because you forgot the words
Holding nothing back plunging for the turns
Left for dead regretting you have never learned the curves
No fine lines in between two ends
Thinking outside those lines about which end is pretend

What is to figure out, the whispers from the wind?
No questions asked, embrace the tickles within
Inside you will always feel it growing
Fantastical brightness, the spark, the rhythm, your hearts pumping
Soon you will know there is no mountain to climb
Just an upward motion, an action toward an view, a awe moment.

Never choose a path, build it.

Always forge ahead.

Adapt, Everything Around Us is in Flux.

YO-YO (Or if your badass, then DIABOLO),

I had a wondrous last weekend. Did you?

   Let me hopefully not be the first to tell you that couchsurfing is BA DASS. If you are ever going anywhere and you feel you don't have enough money... Scratch that... If you are ever traveling, for the best reasons imaginable, you must couch surf! Fancy hotels with all the cool things like comfy beds, pools, and hot tubs (oh shit, I do love hot tubs) are merely melted pillow chocolates, and no one wants that. Couch surfing is a tangled mess of people being people telling stories of how they are people, all while being very nice, completely different, people. GOT IT PEOPLE? So, all in all, kudos and cheers to Lucas, Danay (sp?), and Jake for showing me a good time. 

   Did I learn anything while couch surfing? Hell yes, I need to summit more mountains. Duh, PEOPLE.

   I did want to go to Western Washington University but they think I'm scum and unworthy of their knowledge, or something like that, I don't fully recall their letter. Instead, I am going to Peninsula College in Port Angeles because they think I'm bonerjam, or maybe it's because they accept everyone who applies and has either a High School Diploma or GED? Either way I look at it, I am about to embark on the part of my life where I play more disc golf than I normally do and also gain some knowledge about stuff. Ya know what? I couldn't be happier either. Port Angeles is a beautiful place and I have some friends who live there already. Seems like life is banana, it's sweeter when old and frozen... 

    In case you were all wondering, it IS a good idea to remember where you park your car in Seattle. Patrick and I got some bad directions to my car, which we thought we would be next to when we woke up, but then weren't because we woke up somewhere else, and ended up strutting around for 3 HOURS. However, if you are ever looking to meet some interesting people, the 5 a.m. to 8 a.m. walk is good one.

"O, Bellevue. I thought you were talking about the city.' Chortled random stranger number 1. 'I have seen it before around here. I don't know where it is, I must be going now." Snooted stranger number 1, he held himself so high that lala land had a new vistor, as he jaunted away confused but damn merrily. 

Just a few things to never be afraid of:

1. If you have just hiked around a city for 3 hours and 7 plus miles, don't then be afraid of a 8 mile hike to an alpine lake.

2. If your phone gets lost in someones car whom you've just met, don't be afraid about missed calls, just continue with life and good things will happen.

3. Orange juice

4. If your keys are locked in the trunk of your car, don't be afraid to then just play glow frisbee instead of dealing with your problems.

Champions adapt. Flux is inevitable. Keep a warm heart (a cold one and you'd be dead dummy). Keep an open mind. If your cold in your sleeping bag then don't hold back your farts. Actually, never hold back your farts!

Cheers to my mother, my aunt Moo, Hans Melhus, and Blaire Bear (I think those are the only people who might actually check this) I do this for you guys! Q MUSIC, Q DANCERS, Q RANDOM DARK HALLWAY.

Forever mine and never yours,

   ^wow thats jerky, Jerky Joey.

 beers with Pat and peers.

 Crushing those Seattle hills

 Yea, we dabble in time travel...

 Catch that Sunday morning sunrise.

 I love art

 Such a bonerjam waterfall.

 Do you see it? THAT'S NACHO HAT!

Haha, Emma

friends will be friends, thanks Pat.

Can you kick it? Wicked.

This is great

Anyone for Lunch Rock?

I know, LAME.

gross...

Good eyes

Arrested...